Jordan Coley : Those close to me have probably heard me saying this privately for months, but after Taylor Swift’s cryptic Instagram post Monday morning, I figured it was time I brought this theory forward. Instead of denying her snake side, I hope this weird video of a snake’s butt means that Taylor Swift has decided to lean into her true trickster nature. More feuds, more drama, absolutely no more hangouts with Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds. She got caught either flat-out lying or at least exaggerating for sympathy. She muscled her way into songwriting fame by masterminding insanely catchy songs that simultaneously trashed the reputations of men who had wronged her. It probably means that she's going to release new music, but I also hope it means that she's going to release new music and she's decided to set aside her gee-golly wallflower ingenue persona for good and embrace a public image that more accurately reflects her personality. And thus Taylor was branded a snake, a disingenuous conniver.Īnd now, after a low-profile 2017, Swift has deleted all her social media posts and uploaded a single, undulating reptile tail. Kate Knibbs : Remember when people kept leaving snake emoji on Taylor Swift's (now-deleted) Instagram posts? I barely do, because last summer feels like it happened 5,000 years ago and on a different planet, so to refresh: Taylor Swift bashed Kanye West's lyrics about her in "Famous." Kim Kardashian West then posted a video on Snapchat showing Kanye on the phone with Taylor, who seemed to approve of the song. Who Will Win the Taylor Swift–Katy Perry Feud? In the United States of America-in the year 2017 A.D.-musician Taylor Swift saw that a solar eclipse was coming and picked up her weapons and aimed them at the famed tribe of the Kardashians. It’s 2017.Īndrew Gruttadaro : In ancient Greece-likely around 585 B.C.-a solar eclipse occurred during a battle between the Medes and the Lydians, inspiring the factions to put down their weapons and declare peace. This is my problem with late-period Taylor-not the whining, which has always been part of her brand, but how incompetent the dissemination of said whining is. But there is no reason that can’t wait until Tuesday, when the press cycle is free and clear of eye-burning memes and Game of Thrones complaints. Here’s my issue: Why are you releasing this in the literal middle of the internet’s Eclipse Insanity? I assume that this tease is related to the upcoming VMAs, and that Taylor is contractually obligated to promote her Single Release–Katy Perry Peace Summit (it’s happening, they both need the ratings) throughout the week. Fine I don’t know how she’s gonna get through this press cycle without addressing the Kim/Kanye fiasco, and if she can have a sense of humor about it, all the better. Nobody needs “Bad Blood II” right now-the only person I’m interested in hearing a T-Swift dis track about is Donald Trump.Īmanda Dobbins : My first thought, just like everybody else, was that it’s a snake. This is already a precarious time for someone like Taylor Swift to be releasing new music-what with the foundation of American democracy crumbling and all-and it would be an especially petty time for her to microwave some year-old beef and pick a fight with another celebrity. I truly hope Taylor proves me wrong, though. Do not tell me that someone as image-conscious as Taylor Swift didn’t Rorschach-test this on 50 of her closest besties to confirm that it does indeed look like a snake, which of course indicates that her new song will have something to do with the infamous Taylor-Kimye feud. Justin Charity : Taylor Swift tweeting tentacle porn and we just acting like it’s normal. A post shared by Taylor Swift on at 8:00am PDT
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